Capturing Life's Little Moments: Southern Hospitality in The Swamp

Here is an email from Rich about our trip to Gainesville. He sums it up perfectly!

"Good morning,

I've been to, "The Swamp" once before. Kappy knew somebody who knew somebody who knew something about it, and the next thing I know I'm walking on the field of Florida's field. But it was early August 2002, the field wasn't painted and there weren't 90,000 Gator fans packed into the stands.

I wasn't allowed to take a (Chris) Leak on midfield. Instead, I slyly spit on the ground. You do these things when a team rolls you EVERY SINGLE YEAR SINCE 1986.

You kinda get a chip.

And when you get that chance, you take it. Granted, I didn't, 'hawk a loogie" or anything, but my UK pride forced me to spit a little spit on the field. Yeah, I spit on the field and lemme tell you something... it felt awesome. Someday. I knew SOMEDAY, we'd beat those Gators.

And this was our year, kiddos. Until, the game started. (We'll get to that in a second).

The PEA-Poppin' and I decided to do the Clay Travis, Dixieland Delight tour and 1st up was Gainesville. My # 2 all-time hated team. Took off work Friday and Monday to do the long haul down South. 10 and a half hours. Good times.

*SIDENOTE: Just what is up with the Georgia State Police? It's 3 lanes. What's so wrong with young Gary Busey tearing up the Interstate at 85 with NOBODY around him? And why do you have to trail him for a half-mile before flipping the lights?? Jerkoff. Just give me the ticket for going 85 in a 70. Just pull me over (with nobody around, btw), but don't tease me by saying, "Oh, I see y'all are from outta town, lemme see if I can do ya a fava" and then come back with a ticket. Don't go there, punk. A, "favor" is a warning. Maybe that's how the GA State Police get off...by sitting in the median with their little radar guns just waiting. OH! Did you go 78 in a 70? BOOM. That's illegal, fool!! Here's $170 you owe the fine state of Georgia. But! But, "We didya a fava. We knocked that 85 down to 84 to keep ya outta the Gowgia cowtas. Saved ya two hundred dollas, boy."

Wow. What a favor, eh? Great guys those GA State Police.

Then...then, we hit some construction apparently scheduled for 2021 because nobody was working on those sweet Georgia highways but the speed limit remained 50 mph. fifty. 50. 50 MPH!!

Please understand after getting a $157, "fava", I'm a bit gun-shy driving through Georgia. EVERYBODY IS PASSING ME. SCOOTERS ARE PASSING ME. A RICKSHAW PASSED ME.

So, I got mad, gave the Jetta a bit of gas, and tried to keep with all the traffic buzzing by us. Next thing I know, I'm rolling at 70 in a 55 to creep on all the traffic and damned if there wasn't a cop on bridge ahead of us. 5 minutes after I just got a ticket. So, I ducked into a rest stop and the wife and I watched the car behind us get a ticket by that same dirty cop on the bridge. Then we left. Could you imagine? 2 tickets in less than 20 minutes? And never really speeding? Forget the state of Georgia. I will never eat a peach or a pecan for the rest of my life. *END SIDENOTE.

Let me tell ya about the University of Florida. As much as I want to hate it, I just can't. We were treated with nothing but respect everywhere we went. Probably because UK football travels so poorly. And we do. Penny and I stood at the Catwalk as the team bus pulled up beside the stadium and it was the saddest damned thing I've ever seen. Cobb was giggling at us getting off the bus and I don't blame him. There was maybe 200 of us. I almost started walking with them but remembered its Florida and I don't want a 19-year-old cornerback that runs a 4.5 forty lighting me up.

Listen. This is how poorly UK football travels: 90,569 people were in the stadium. Maybe 2,000 were UK fans. Maybe. The UK fan section was a sliver in the swamp and one brave soul taped up a UK flag on the swamp and it was promptly taken down. Friday night, Penny and I went bar-hopping and Florida fans were great sports and treated us with respect. Most were shocked that we were UK fans and that we made the trip all the way from Louisville. We walked down University Blvd passed a bar with a window open, some little Rich-Daddy's-Girl goes, "Oh-my-god...there's some Kentucky fans."

It was like she just saw 2 unicorns walking down the street. Penny and I just waved and walked on. And the next place we saddled up to, we ran into 2 cool Kats from Lexington and became a wolf-pack.

Ok, so now it's me, Penny, Landon, and Travis trolling around the bars. That was our wolf-pack. The coolest part of the University of Florida is it's campus. The stadium is next to the arena which is next to the baseball stadium. And somehow, there are tons of dorms, apartments, and open fields. Roughly 47 million people cram in this area on game day. And traffic isn't that bad. Its magic.

Friday night, we sat at the bar of a place called, "The Swamp." Kappy worked there in college. I asked if anyone remembered him but nobody did. Mildly disappointed, I asked if there were any cool Florida fans we could sit with and sure enough, there was this 22-year old pharmacology major who volunteered to be our friend at the bar. Zack Singer. He's a Pike and about to get into grad school at UNC.

Here's some other things you may find interesting about Zack Singer:

*He's Jewish but his girlfriend is Catholic

*His parents are lawyers in Tampa, and his momma represented Bubba the Love Sponge in the hog trial.

*His older brother makes $600,000 a year, and wires him $500 cash every week to, 'LIVE IT UP! WHOOO!"

*Of all the teams Florida plays, he fights FSU fans the most.

*His freshman year, he, "smushed" 113 girls because he was roommates with Hernandez...who, "smushed" 150 hot babes.

*His family is the Singer sewing company. So yeah, that's how he rolls.

*His cell is: (813) 390-6777. Feel free to call him anytime you please.

Ok, onto the game.

Our tickets were in the Champions Club and we felt like we were high rollers. Mind you, the seats are a little ways up, but with these seats, you get a free buffet (spinach salad, three cheese mashed potatoes, shrimp and asparagus pasta salad, pork tenderloin, rolls, dessert, lemonade, sweet tea and at half time, you get free ice cream. In order to own tickets in the Champions Club, you have to donate $10,000 every year to the University and you get eight season football tickets. Unbelievable.

Hats off to Florida. Those other 89,000 fans crammed into the stadium...they know the deal. As bad as we think we are as Kentucky fans, we are minor leagues compared to the rest of the SEC. Maybe that's why those chicks were blown away UK fans were walking around. All you see is Gator. E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E. I know every SEC school has some pride and I've been to 6 different schools...but Florida gives Auburn a run for its money in propaganda. And that's why we stuck out so badly wearing our UK gear. Remember Travis and Landon? Yeah, we ran into them again before the game as we also saw many other UK fans walking around University Blvd., tailgating and cheering for the C-A-T-S.

At Commonwealth, UK fans sorta get together when the announcer yells, "...and that's good...for another FFFFFFFFIIIIIRRRRSSSSSTTTT DOWWWWN, KENNNNNNNNNNNNTUCKY!!!"

And everyone cheers and waves to the right and the Tri Delts go, "woooooooooooo."

Florida? Something is going on every 5 minutes. And everyone but us was in on it. Literally every down, those fans have some kind of chant...AND EVERYONE DOES IT. 3rd quarter ends and the whole stadium stands up, locks arms, and starts swaying as they sing a song together. Every Florida fan in the stadium locked up and sang harmony...no bubbles, no troubles.

Speaking of the game...Kentucky is exactly what I told you. A middle of the pack team. Did everyone have a good time running up the score on really great teams like Akron, WKU, and Louisville? Lot of fun, eh?

Well, party is over, kiddos. UK just got smacked in the mouth, looked rattled as it happened, and played scared the rest of the way. As good as Randall Cobb and as fast as Locke is, its still like taking a rubber-band gun to a tank fight. Don't look now, but I think that 18-old freshman just scored again. 6 touchdowns wasn't good enough, eh, kid? Listen, go over to the sideline to get a breather while we connect on yet another crossing route for a first down.

Unfortunately, its not difficult to shut down Kentucky offense. When most of the defense is as fast as the running back and your QB can't stretch the field, its easy to double-cover your only weapon. Thusly, KY scored 14 points...7 of which were from a fake field goal.

Where does this leave UK? Can they get to a decent bowl? Which one? Where? How? Who they beating to get there?

What bums me out is the potential of KY...and where we can be. Penny and I had an absolute BLAST and experienced something worth an 11 hour drive. Those people in Gainesville...they are the truth. That's what SEC football is about. Thanks to Schmidt, I experienced Auburn-LSU, and that blew my mind. Florida? Same deal.

Lexington has a great thing going...but it doesn't compare. Sadly. And things won't change until we decide to be a big-time program and quit settling for Music City Bowls.

-R3"

** We were supposed to meet Rich's friend Justin (Kappy) and his girlfriend Jessica in Gainesville Friday so we could spend the weekend with them and go to the game. However; due to an unfortunate circumstance, Kappy and Jess were unable to make the trip from Miami to Gainesville. Jessica was so kind to let us still stay at her Mom's house, which is an amazing home. We met up with her Dad at his tailgate spot and he gave us our tickets to the game.